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This is why John sux at Diablo. This page is what our site is all about and I feel it is my duty to explain to all our fans why exactly John sux. Reason number one, and this is an important one, John is a newbie. Not like he just bought the game, but like he has never actually played it before. He runs around being stupid and slow, it sort of makes you want to shoot him. Reason number two, John is a warrior. Anyone who has played Diablo will tell you that the sorcerer is the dominant character in the game, you can't beat a fireball that does 1000+ damage. Sure a warrior can attack fast but what good does that do to monsters that run away and on anyone with teleport. Reason number three, John does not use mana shield. This is just plain stupid, why wouldn't you want 2-3 hundred extra life? Just plain careless if you ask me. Reason number four is simple, he walks all the way around Grizwald's shop to get to a town portal. Thats right he takes the long way, not the path right between the two houses that leads right to it. He takes the rout that goes down by the bridge to the witches house and then all the way up. Reason number five and the final reason, John will not stop saying "what?". Sure he can do the spinarooni but that hardly makes up for it, its annoying as hell. It's like he thinks he is some sort of wrestler or something.


PS: The newest reason why John sux is (drum roll)(drum roll) .... he is extremely whipped by Ellie, they weren't even going out yet and he was whipped; is he a pansy or what?


If you also think that John sux, or know someone else who does, let us know at our e-mial page and we will post it for ya. After all, if someone sux the grand high pumba of donkey cock, like John, the public has the right to give them shit.

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